Sometimes Giants Fall and Sometimes They're Awakened!

I really don’t like admitting this, but I cried around 3 AM, Wed., Nov. 9^th. I’m not sure if it was due to the outcome of the election, or due to having suddenly realized I had to be up by 6:30 and I am not a morning person, at all!

Okay, I do know it was at least in part due to the outcome of the election. I have prayed over our nation, I have prayed for a revival, I prayed the sleeping giant would wake up and get back in the game. Well, the giant showed, and it showed up in full armor. We have been given another chance, another opportunity to show how much we love and appreciate the blessing of being American citizens.            May we never again be so blind to our leaders and so absent in the fight for our freedoms!!

 I knew I didn’t have the time or resources to have a great effect on the election but you bet I posted, tweeted and shared all I could to show HRC's true colors. Yes, I truly believe she is a morally bankrupt person. Yes, I believe she is greedy, controlling and dangerous. Yes, I believe she is a threat to national security, to my liberties and to my way of life. I’m not sure how so many people fail to come to these same conclusions… but anyway, just because I believe these things about HRC does not mean I think Trump is an angel, definitely not our savior. That position is eternally occupied by the One and only JC!  I am also uncertain how people make this leap from one opinion to the other, I dislike HRC so I think DT is perfect. Not!! He is flawed, so am I. He has changed his view on certain issues, so have I. He speaks his mind, so do I… yeah oops! Yes, gasp, I have said hurtful things in my life, I do regret them, all of them. I do want to be forgiven for those things I did in my past. Don’t we all?

Not an excuse but please realize passionate people often get defensive very quickly and often say what fills their mouth before their mind has the chance to filter their thoughts; then in a flash, they’re uttered into the open air without proper processing. Unfortunately, I am guilty of this. I have said more times than I care to admit, “Oops, did I say that out loud?”  Control comes with maturity and wisdom; I pray for these daily.  Thankfully I can say I have way better control than I did a decade ago.

I think Donald is most guilty of being a passionate, even egotistical and somewhat of a naïve locker room guy. I think it is despicable what he said, I do, but two more things I want you to consider; first, it was eleven years ago. Are we all the same person we were eleven years ago? Second, we most likely have ALL said something at least once in our lives in private that we would not have said if we knew we were being recorded. Come on, think about this honestly before you pounce or become defensive. I will admit it, I have. No, not proud of it, but it’s the truth and I would never say those things now; would you? Would he? Probably not. We all have gotten caught up in the moment at least once in our lives, in one way or another. We’ve all said or reacted in a way we regretted after the fact.

I know for those who do not like Trump it’s more than his lack of tact, his policies probably bother you too.  I have one more very important and relevant question- Why? Why do these policies bother you?

Why does banning partial birth abortion offend you?

The baby is already almost born? This is beyond sick, it’s evil, it’s disgusting. The medical community has said there is NO medical reason for any woman that would require a partial birth abortion, ever! It’s repulsive, do you know what they do to those babies? It’s what nightmares are made of. It’s pure evil, not even radical muslims support abortion. Muslims who behead teenagers and blow up toddlers do not believe in abortion; what does that say about those who do?

Closed borders?

What is wrong with closed borders? Mexico, China, Iran, etc. so many countries have closed borders. They would arrest you if you cross over illegally into their countries. So why are we wrong? Legal immigration is good, illegal is bad. I often wonder why saying legal vs illegal isn’t self-explanatory! Those who come here legally should be angry with those coming here illegally, they are the problem. They hinder the progress of those following the law. I am totally supportive of legal immigration, some of my ancestors immigrated here. You do know the US cannot support the entire population of the world, right? Why are we at fault for having a policy you support in other countries? Most of the time we’re criticized for not being more like other countries. *sigh*

Lastly, our enemies. Yes, we have enemies. HRC and BO both refuse to recognize radical islam as our enemy. Don’t freak out, I said RADICAL! They hate us, want to control us, rape us, enslave us, kill us. Personally, I consider anyone who harbors those types of unhealthy feelings toward me, to be my enemy, call me crazy. Why is it okay for her to take their money? Pay for play? People only take money like this for favors, you must know this! She also says she is for women and children!! How is that possible? Seriously, tell me how this is possible. She is for abortion which deprives many babies the right to ever become children, children she supports, but she is okay with them being murdered as babies... It also takes an emotional toll on the women who have abortions. Women are suppressed by those she takes money from…. How can she be for women and scheme in pay for play with our enemies who abuse, control, rape, and kill women at will. How is this possible? You can’t have it both ways… Oh and gays, she is for gays? Really? Not if she is taking money, pay for play with the same enemy who drowns, beats, and throw gays off buildings. Why are you people who support her not asking these questions?? And for blacks, oh sure she just supports Planned Parenthood whose founder was for the elimination of the black race, hence her encouraging abortion mostly among blacks. Repulsive!!

And celebrities who support her, it’s all so confusing, I don't understand... Oh Miley, your entire wardrobe would not be able to cover you sufficiently to appease those who she is consorting with. No more singing, performing and what is that she does, twirping? Whatever, some supposed dance move, I don't watch her. No more walking around half naked with your unhinged tongue hanging out. Katie, ditto what I said about Miley, how do you two feel about stoning? Raven, well, they would throw you off a building! But okay, if you’re good with that, none of my business if you want to vote for that. Some of those other people, I guess they’re celebrities, I have no idea who they are. But I would appreciate you all being more informed, especially if you think Americans should listen to your opinion. I have to say, you seem not to be aware that merely being a performer of any kind is not enough to qualify you as a political pundit. This is very important for you to know; you need to take this seriously since many misguided children listen to you not knowing how uniformed you are. Being informed is invaluable, in particular if you love your way of life. You would not be allowed that lifestyle under our enemy or in a socialist society, just thought you should know!

           

Thankfully this is irrelevant now, she did not get elected, we were spared that disaster. That giant was defeated. Now, a part of me feels for her. She spun a web and got tangled up in her own lies, deceptions and schemes. I know I need to pray for her, and I will, I have. But as a lesson, no matter who is POTUS, I hope we never allow ourselves to become so comfortable with our leaders that we leave the checks and balances to them. We can never take their word for it, or believe we have to pass the bill to find out what is in it, again! Did anyone really believe this? And, we should never allow them to forget they work for us. This is our America, our ancestors paid for this land, for our freedoms with their blood, their sweat, their tears and too often their lives. We owe it to them to keep it the land of the free because of the brave, not the land of the enslaved and easily offended because of the evil and greedy.

Good morning giant, we’ve missed you!!!!

 

ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS

I know everyone is waiting anxiously for me to voice my opinion on the newest Trump fiasco.... Just kidding, most couldn't care less, but I hope you will read what I have to say on the matter and take what I say into consideration.

 

First, no matter who you are those types of comments are unacceptable, period. And as a woman who has experienced sexual harassment I speak with some knowledge. In my early 20s, more than once. On one of those occasions I was unfortunate enough to be alone sitting near 3 young males who spoke to me in a way, said disgusting things that would make Trump's words seem harmless. I do not consider myself a victim, ever. I choose to learn from situations and grow from them. I won't say it did not immediately affect me b/c it did, I cried later, far away from any witnesses. But I will say this, if I saw these 3 men today, I would not hold this situation against them. I had to forgive and move on. Especially if there is an apology, but my faith compels me to forgive, regardless. Also b/c I know I have said more things I regret in my life than I care to admit! As a child, as a teenager, as an adult.... Everyone close to me knows I am a passionate, opinionated person with a sharp tongue that often acts before I think. There are many words I wish I could take back. 

Unfortunately, I've brought many people, friends, family to tears with my cut throat replies and for that I am now very sorry and I pray those people do not judge me on what I did all those years ago just as I cannot judge another for their words. 

 

Remember, we have ALL said things we regret. We ALL want to be forgiven for the things we've said in the past, so why is it we aren't willing to give that same consideration and forgiveness to others, to Trump. 

 

One last thought, something we all say....

ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS!

Before you make a decision and I encourage you to pray, here are a few things to remember; FDR, Kennedy, and Clinton were all womanizers, had affairs, Bill has even been accused of rape and inappropriate behavior in the Oval Office. Why are these behaviors more excusable than words? 

Hillary accused a 12 yo girl who was beaten and raped to the point she was never able to have children. Her innocence, her dignity, her chance at motherhood all stolen, ripped away from her. And Hillary's words in defense of her vile, despicable, DEPLORABLE client were to accuse the 12yo of wanting to be raped, she fantasized about rape! I was a 12yo girl once, that was a fear, not a fantasy. With that same tongue she spoke the words, "What does it matter now anyway?" in reference to the lost lives of 4 men who she failed to send help to in Benghazi. If words bother you so much, then think about her words and realize her words not only hurt, they cost lives and set rapists free

It's NEVER too late, so NEVER give up!

As this May 2016 comes to a close, I feel compelled to share something I have not shared with many people before, and certainly not this way, publicly on social media. I realized last month that this May marks the 10 year anniversary of a very pivotal event in my life. I also realized through a conversation with one of my children, who shall remain nameless, that this, sharing certain things about myself is a weak area for me. Talking to people, posting funny stories about my kids or giving my opinion is my norm, my comfort zone. I rarely think I am wrong; Jerry can substantiate this (LOL!) and I love to make people laugh. I also don’t mind, through my writing making people cry or feel lots of emotion. BUT, I absolutely do not like sharing my pain or vulnerability. This is definitely something I should have gotten over years ago, but, well, I haven’t. I am trying. I never thought it was necessary to share some of what I went through. Probably for most it isn’t, but if it is part of my testimony than I may be robbing God of His much deserved glory. Or maybe there is that one person who does not understand what they’re going through, and reading my experience and outcome might help or give them hope.

So here it goes….. and I will attempt to make a long story short.... I said attempt!

To give you a little back ground, I was very athletic, very active when I was kid, pre-teen. We were in gymnastics, played softball, basketball, swam all summer in our pool. I even played soccer here in Mustang so long ago that I had to play on a boys’ team due to there not being a girls’ team for me to play on. I always did well on the Presidential physical fitness tests. I loved getting those reports back showing what percentage I was in the national ranking, I ranked high. I was very active and had the appetite of a teenage boy. I was even proud of the fact that when we stayed the night with our grandparents I was able to eat more pancakes than both my older sisters and my grandpa. I ate nine, without any effort. It was really cute, at that time, that I could do this. I was tall for my age, almost 5’3” at 10,  I I was thin and growing or so we thought, I stayed just under 5'3"… Then the winter when I was 14. My life changed drastically… and remember, this is from the point of view of a 14year old girl. In less than 2 months, I went from 100 lbs. to 145 lbs. BAM!!!  What changed? Doctor’s appointments, tests, blood work, more tests, exams, etc. talk about adding insult to injury… They came to the obvious conclusion, my thyroid was out of whack, my levels were low, and we discovered I had an irregular heart murmur… isn’t a heart murmur an irregular heart beat?  This has always confused me. Thankfully the murmur has never caused me a moment of problems. However, the thyroid issue has caused me more than my share of problems. Probably more than it should have, but again, I was 14, kids are cruel, especially boys who used to think you were pretty and oh the unrealistic body types on the teen magazines! I withdrew from a lot of stuff due to feeling self-conscious and uncomfortable in my own skin. Did I mention Dr. Richter decided although I was old enough to have a thyroid problem, I was too young to treat.  I was left to figure it out. Sigh! This was devastating because my weight was NOT the only thing affected. My focus and concentration were suffering, school became a chore, I became unhappy…. Well losing 2 grandparents that winter/spring and my parents divorcing may have also had a profound effect on my mood and lack of happiness. I know it led to my stomach ulcer a year later. This was also a dangerous time for me. You see I struggled to lose a pound, I went without eating, if I did eat I tried to eat healthy, low cal, no fat…. Blah blah blah. So, the stomach ulcer got bad and I got to where I could not hold down food. Even though I was treated, my diet had to be changed to accommodate the healing process. Through this experience I lost weight, and I discovered and adopted a very unhealthy habit that followed me into adulthood. When I became weary of not eating, the other became my go to, to keep off the weight. I was back down to a slender 104 lbs and very proud of it….! Before you become impressed, the effects were long lasting, I am getting to that part. I needed very strong glasses at 17 years old. I was told my eyes were so bad I may need bifocals by the time I was in my 30s. Oh how my older self would like to choke my younger self!

Fast Forward now to 2006…. By this time, I have 5 children, which in itself is a miracle. I was told at 26 after 2 kids that my thyroid was fine but my system was in menopause…. 26??? Strangely in 1997 even though the Navy thought my thyroid was fine, I literally did not show any trace of certain hormones in my system. And according to a doctor in CC Texas who was off base who was helping me, informed me I had almost no good cholesterol and very little bad. No, not good! Anyway, 2006, 5 kids. 2 boys, 3 girls. Worth mentioning, our oldest son was born with what some called a chromosomal defect, the doctor in Corpus Christi set me straight and mentioned many babies born in the valley have gastrochisis like our son. There is much malnourishment down there…. Ouch! Major guilt plagued me.  So now 5 kids and I am more miserable than I could have ever imagined. I had zero energy, no focus, no drive, no joy and I could not stay awake to save my life. I homeschool, this was a bad situation. I rarely got dressed. If it wasn’t for the help of a dear friend, Caron, you know who you are and my oldest daughter I am not sure how Cole would have been taken care of as an infant. If I ate, I gained weight, if I starved myself, I gained weight, if I breathed, I gained weight and I was nursing!? I could not remember one day to the next, my sleep was not restful. I was miserable, I felt hopeless. I have never been one to be depressed. I always worked through what I had to and always tried to keep going, keep fighting, keep overcoming. Determined, I had always found a way to function and get by. I am told I am extremely obstinate… I think the exact thing my mom says is, I am the most- stubborn person on planet earth. But I had nothing left, my joy was non-existent I no longer wanted to find a way, overcome. I had also become very mean in my misery. My determination was dead. The last straw was when I looked at Jerry and said, “I honestly don’t care whether or not I wake up in the morning.” With that Jerry said, “Enough, we’re finding a doctor who can help you.”

May 2006, we found a doctor, a doctor who believed in natural healing. Fellow in Endrochronology, etc. I went for my initial visit, blood work, weigh in, consult, etc. That week we left for Houston, JBQ regionals. A week later I returned to see the doctor to find out what was going on. I had not only gained 9 lbs. in that week I was exhausted, more than usual. The doctor came in the room, looked at me compassionately and leaned on the counter. My first thought was please God, don’t let him tell me nothing is wrong… Yes, I wanted something to be wrong! First words out of his mouth, “Have you killed anybody yet?” I replied as I began to cry, “No, but I have wanted to.” His reply, “I can imagine. But we’re going to fix it so you don’t feel this way anymore!” I cried and I cried and I cried! Turns out all this time my thyroid was screwed up, big time. He then explained why the other doctors could not tell. They lacked performing enough blood tests to look at other levels of the thyroid. Most doctors only test 1-3, there are many more levels that need to be tested to determine what is going on. He asked me about my kids, if any had certain defects or neuro problems. At the time my answer was no. He was shocked, not only that I had 5 kids, and he said do not have anymore, your thyroid cannot take it, but that not one was mentally retarded or suffering neurologically. Of course we know now that Cole was affected by my condition, but he is also exceeding expectations and already has an amazing testimony. However, it did not end there. My blood work also revealed I have a condition called Insulin Resistance. This was very likely contributing to my moods and exhaustion as much as my low functioning thyroid. He explained this to me, gave me a diet to follow and insisted I do so religiously as he then informed me of the even worse news. According to the path I was on, he said I would be a diabetic by the time I was 40, and heart disease is a major result of IR. Due to the over production of insulin, my arteries would begin to harden…… Not what I wanted to hear. But the worst news was yet to come. Although the low functioning thyroid was not anything I could control, my IR was most likely and as I knew most assuredly a self-inflicted condition. Yes, anorexia and bulimia had repercussions I could never have imagined. It affected both my sons, my eye sight, my health and my joy, the affects were long term.

This gets better, so keep reading!!!!

BUT, we definitely serve a God of second chances. I followed the diet, my new way of eating, religiously. I lost 17.5 lbs in the first 28 days, and I had energy lots of energy. By September of that year I had lost almost 50…. Then, God had other plans and blessed us with baby #6, and I am so glad He did. Her nickname is My Joy. I stayed on the diet through my pregnancy and beyond. In 10 years I have only had 2 episodes’/blood sugar crashes and PTL, I have not had any blood tests come back irregular. My thyroid has had to be increased. I now take more than most, as much as women in their 70s…. But it’s natural, pig thyroid and I feel better than I think I ever have. I do not have diabetes, and my heart appears to have not been affected at all…. Oh, did I mention, (no one believes this), I have grown an inch and a half in the last 10 years and I no longer require eye glasses… No, I am not kidding! I was the shortest of the sisters, now, it appears I am the tallest! I am down almost 70 lbs from my heaviest and again, I have more energy than I did in my 20s. I am truly healthier than I have ever been! Other than thyroid and vitamins, I am not on any meds of any kind. In fact, I haven’t had an antibiotic in 10 years, other than when I had my c-sections.

I know this was long, but I want anyone and everyone who reads this to understand how bad things were and how much better they are now. Never ever give up hope, never ever think it is too late, never think it can’t or won’t get better. God made us resilient, all of us. I always hear how kids are resilient, but we all are. We are made to do incredible things if we would only show discipline and be faithful to what we need to do. I absolutely believe nothing is impossible with God. In His hands I am able, I just have to be willing and obedient. It isn’t always easy to say no to sugar and carbs that affect my insulin production, but the benefits far outweigh the sacrifice… which really isn’t a sacrifice if you think about it.

For this, I get a lot of sympathy, sympathy I don’t feel I need or want. So, the next time you see me at a church dinner or out to eat, don’t say how sorry you are that I have to eat differently or that I have to say no to so many foods, be happy for me. I am! It’s a choice, a choice I make every day. A choice that has given me back my life and made me healthier. I believe God gave me this life and I owe it to Him and to those I love to do and to be my best. I wouldn’t go back to where I was 10 years ago for all the rolls and potatoes in the world!

So, happy 10 year anniversary to me. I celebrate with my protein drink, cottage cheese and berries, and low carb avocado roll ups, oh and better health!


Here’s to trusting in God and never giving up!

Not only will I always remember, I will never forget.

 

I don’t have much time to blog anymore, it seems life has many other ideas of what I should do with my time. Even now as I sit here typing, I can think of at least 6 other things, some more important, some less important, that I could be doing. But as many times before, this one won’t stop nagging at me. So in order to alleviate some thoughts from my noggin, I will type until every last thought and opinion on this matter have all been set free.... Well, maybe just most of them.

First, let me start by saying I am an animal lover. I love animals, I truly see them as a gift from God to enhance and bless our lives. I love cats, dogs, birds, fish… aren’t they relaxing… elephants, mice, guinea pigs, pigs, dolphins… I could go on but you get the point. You may have noticed I did not mention any reptiles, that was not a mistake. Although I do believe all men/women are created equal, I do not feel the same about animals and there I have now exposed my bias! Anyway, I do love animals. I feel anyone who is cruel to animals, or children is a special kind of evil and I have no tolerance for this…. Oops now I have exposed my intolerance, I may have to watch my back after this blog is posted…. I do love, love animals and learning about them. HOWEVER, if I see one more post about this gorilla, I may scream. I truly am saddened that this creature who was minding his own business, living his life in his habitat had to lose his life, I really am. I am however not mad at the zoo officials, they had to make a tough call, not a call any animal lover EVER wants to make, and they had to do it fast. They are not to blame, they suffered a great loss.  I am not angry with the 4year old, you know, 4 year olds have guardians for a reason… Enough said! No, I cannot watch the full video, but I saw enough to know. It is a great loss. But human loss is even greater. Like it or not, agree with me or not, human life is more valuable and just as irreplaceable. According to God’s very words, we are His greatest creation. Unfortunately, this gorilla is the victim of human error, as was the child. This child should not lose his life due to a possible lack of supervision. The whole thing is a tragedy, a tragedy this child will realize more and more as he gets older. I am certain because I ran over an elderly cat of ours, years ago and I have never forgotten it. I bawled, had nightmares, then cried some more. This story isn’t over for those involved. It is a tragedy all around.....

BUT…. BUT, I have to ask WHY, WHY does it seem on this day of remembrance for those who sacrificed; some who sacrificed all, some who will never hug their family again, some who will never be the same, some who suffer day after day, some wishing they had lost their own lives, some who watched as others gave the ultimate sacrifice I have to ask why does this gorilla’s life seem as though it is getting more attention than the brave men and women who provided us the freedoms that allow us to spew and post opinions and even ignorance on social media without the fear of being stoned or having our heads chopped off!!!! I think this is a legitimate question and the longest sentence I have ever typed! (I would take the time to mention the lives of the unborn that are also needlessly lost, but this would become the longest blog I’ve ever written) Do those who have taken the time to post their opinions calling the zoo officials murderers have any clue what today is about? Do they know this day was originally named Decoration Day? Do they know it started after the civil war by Union veterans and merged into a remembrance for all American soldiers who gave their lives while in military service? (That is ALL. The red, the yellow, the black, the white, the brown…. ALL) Do those who are crying outrage and tragedy for this gorilla have any idea how many people died for their freedom? Do they acknowledge it? Do they celebrate it? Honestly, do they appreciate it?

 

Admittedly, even I, a very patriotic, freedom favoring, liberty loving, red white and blue wearing American knows that my expressions of gratitude nor the tears I have shed or the prayers I have prayed can come anywhere near providing the thanks they each deserve for all they have given. I don’t know if they can see or feel my gratitude, but I hope they can. I hope and pray for the rest of my life to make sure not any veteran I encounter ever doubts how much I appreciate his contribution and sacrifice. If you ever doubt that they appreciate our expression of thanks, let me share something with you. While in Academy a few months ago, to buy Jerry a new pocket knife we (I had 5 of my kids with me) encountered a Vietnam veteran. As soon as I saw his hat, I turned to him as he was looking around. As soon as I caught his attention, I said, "Thank you, sir for your service and sacrifice for our country." He choked immediately, I involuntarily decided to join him in choking. The kids also acknowledged him.  We struck up a conversation about the sad state of our country. Right after as I was looking for a knife, he insisted on helping us find the right one. He even took out his knife and showed us what he liked about it, which brand was best for what Jerry wanted. He still seemed to have a spirit of serving and I was appreciative of his help. I think he needed to help me as much as I needed his help, if you know what I mean.

Remember these mostly faceless human beings who gave so much, they are someone’s father, mother, brother, sister, husband, wife, uncle, aunt, or child...They may be yours; appreciate them, respect them all as though they are. Take the time, not just today, every opportunity you have to let them know not only do you remember those who have served and or sacrificed, but you will never, ever forget.